Sunday, March 13, 2011

Tired

I didn't post this on my blog because I don't like to advertise the fact that we'll be away from our house, but we went to St. Louis on Thursday to meet my parents and have a mini vacation.  We went to the zoo on Friday, then the Magic House on Saturday.  We got home yesterday evening.  It was a fantastic trip.  It was the best zoo trip I've ever had (minus the departure), and we got to see more animals out and playing than I've seen.  The kids got to ride the carousel there, Hannah rode twice.  It was so much fun.  Yesterday when we went to the Magic House we played with so much stuff.  The kids love that place because there is so much cool stuff to play with.  I would highly suggest anyone with children visit that place.  I was able to get a hotel with two rooms, so we all stayed together.  Also, it had an indoor pool, so we got to swim every night.  The kids had a blast.  Hannah keeps telling me more and more of her "my favorite was..." times.  I am absolutely exhausted now.  We didn't sleep well, of course, being in a hotel.  It was worth the exhaustion though. :)

I'm emotionally exhausted right now.  I'm not sure if I can recount all the draining things right now.  It's strange to see someone that has been a constant forever, now falter a bit.  I'm also dealing with stuff with our Sunday school teacher and class more.  I'm just unable to function right now.  I truly feel like I'm maintaining my life by just sitting on the couch and staring.  I'm praying that tomorrow will be a much better day.  I'm not sure if I'll have a good attitude with my kids if I'm the same.

I know I've been away from here for a while, but I was preparing to leave, and then vacating. :)

I have this nervous feeling in my stomach, like I have a huge project to turn in for school, and I don't have any idea what I'm doing, and it's due tomorrow.  It's like I'm 5 minutes from my flight leaving and I'm still at security.  Ugh.  I wonder what's going on that I'm so nervous about.

5 comments:

  1. Jennie, it sure sounds like you are having some nasty anxiety feelings. These are tough. The feeling is real, but you cannot pin it on anything. I know what you are feeling. I still get this once in a while, just exactly as you described, something big is due and you don't even know what you are doing. Fortunately for me they are not frequent anymore. You can read between the lines.

    I'm glad you had a good trip with the kids and family to St. Louis! I wondered why you had been silent for some days, now my anxiety (there is that nasty word again) is relieved.

    Tomorrow will be better!

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  2. I read you loudly and clearly. :)

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  3. Also, you're tired. Things get bigger in our minds and thoughts when we are tired. Also, you had a fun family weekend, and it's hard going back to the daily reality. Find something the kids can do tomorrow that you can just be lazy and watch and not feel guilty about it!

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  4. It was a lot of fun. Dad's doing fine and is going to the urologist tomorrow afternoon late. He has mucho questions to ask and should find the answers from him. We watch. wait and pray and that is all we can do. Try not to stress about him and hand it to the Lord of Comfort, please. I cannot get by unless I do that and keep myself super busy. Self-absorbed? Maybe, but it keeps my head above water. Love to you, my Lovely One.

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  5. I am not faltering, just old and recently abused. God is able. I am not. Physical improvement every day. Right after the procedure, I felt great because I was doing almost nothing. Now I am doing lots and feel tired. Strange twist here. "Faltering!" What a term to use on an older guy. I did tow your children most of the zoo day. Thanks for caring and for commenting even though God is working out the problem. I love you.

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