ALONE!

I went out alone tonight!  First time since April 29!  I happened to run into a couple of friends and their just-under-two year old, who spent the entire shopping trip at Walgreens calling and looking for me, and when I said calling I really mean bellowing.  But I wasn't responsible for him, and that made it better.  I didn't have to corral him, or hush him, or make sure he wasn't eating the cart (which he was).  I also went to the bank and Hobby Lobby all in one hour!  It would've been a lot faster, had I not run into those friends and another friend at Walgreens.  In any case, I felt like a human again upon my return and not some mutant anger-monger that hasn't been alone in public in almost a month.  We'll see which one decides to show up tomorrow.  Human vs Mutant Anger-Monger.  This could be the start of something.  Hm...Dusty should write that app.

On a side note, please pray that the severe storms dissipate tomorrow before they get to us in the evening.  We're supposed to have a high likelihood of tornadoes, and honestly, I'm done with this season.  I'm jumpy and anxious every time the wind blows.  I'm beginning to have day-mares that my house will blow away with us in it. I mean, did you see the footage of the house that's now just a foundation?  That would be what our house would look like.  It's a slab foundation.  We have no underground anywhere to go.  We have my in-laws', but if it just happens on us, then there's no planning.  Granted, I know about it 24 hours in advance, but I really don't want to have to drive all the way there and get no sleep, and have the kids get no sleep, and then just sit in there while nothing happens.  Ugh.  Convenience vs Safety.  Is this really another app?  Probably not.  That would be lame.

Dr. Pepper

I have had an interesting relationship with this soda.  Now, you need to know this before we start, we are no longer soda drinkers.  We drink strictly water, unless we're at someone's house that serves a different drink.  We'll occasionally drink milk, too, but for the last few years it has been basically water.

I have always hated Dr. Pepper.  It tastes like cough medicine.  My sister-in-law would have Dr. Pepper for every meal, if she could get enough nutrition from it.  Not with her meal, FOR her meal.  I had a DP one day, on a whim and realized I did not have the hatred for it any longer.  I actually enjoyed it.  I had it on another occasion, and another.  Then last week I had it at MOPs.  Then I had another one last week I had bought (oh yeah, we buy and keep sodas because we know that a lot of our friends and family drink it, so we keep it on hand, in case someone visiting wants one).  I drank the whole can in about 3 minutes.  Then we went to my in-laws' on Sunday, and I had more.  I could feel it becoming a habit.  Dusty's aunt gave us a 2-liter she had brought that was extra.  I drank 2 during lunch yesterday, and I just had another glass.  Yep.  Pretty sure I'm feeling an addiction coming on.  I wanted to drink more last night at 8, but I didn't want the caffeine (or calories).  Weird.  Tastes change.

Ahhhh...

Want to know what I made tonight?

Tomorrow we're having a birthday party for Dusty's grandfather.  He has been diagnosed with cancer in his lymph nodes now.  I'm not sure what all the details are, but I know he's going to have chemo.  His birthday is Tuesday, and she said that it's most likely his last birthday, and they want to have a party for him.  He's now incapable of swallowing anything with any texture, so we're making foods that are pretty mushy.  I have the job of the cake and I'm making sweet potato casserole.  I also wanted to make something more interesting, so here's the answer to the Title question.  I'm making maple and bacon cupcakes.  Here's the recipe, for the most part, of what I use. French Toast and Bacon Cupcakes with Maple Frosting.  I made 12 normal size ones, and 9 minis.  I'm hoping they like them.  I don't really care though because my kids and husband LOVE them.  I'm exhausted today, but I wanted you to know what I made tonight.  Here's a picture.

Cute isn't it?

Discipline

Not only is it one of the hardest words ever for me to type, it's also one of the hardest things ever with which to be consistent.  Recently I've had the privilege of noticing my kids notice other kids' bad behavior.  With one situation my kids were literally sitting there staring with their mouths open at the disobedient child.  Seth looked at me with amazement, and question like, "Mommy, WHY are you not DOING something?!?"  Later on I had to explain that it's the responsibility of the mommy and daddy to discipline their own children, which is why I didn't say anything to that child, nor should they.  My children are not perfect.  My children do disobey, but they know when they do there are repercussions that will happen EVERY time.  This is the key to having good children.  There's nothing that says that my children will not rebel when they get older.  After they're out from under my roof, I have little control over that, except through prayer, but while they're young, you better believe I keep tabs on them.  They know when they do something to disrespect someone or something, then they will get in trouble. My children could be just as disobedient and raucous as other kids.  They've just been taught that is not how to act.  I love my children.  They are marvelous miracles.

I love my husband, I may as well note. :)  He is the reason that I'm able to be as consistent with our kids as I am.  He is my support, and my encourager.  He is such a wonderful man.

OK.  The end.

Monday

I love weekends.  I love the time I get to spend with my kids during the week, but I love weekends.  I get to spend so much time with my husband, and I love that.  My children are my life right now, but my husband is my life forever.  My children will leave and start their own families, but my husband is here for better or worse til death do us part.

I made chocolate chip cookie dough cupcakes for MOPs today.  It was a potluck thing we were doing, and I made these because of a request another MOPs mom made of me.  She had them once, and really wanted me to make them again.  I really didn't want to make them yesterday, but I did.  The moms loved them.  I'm pretty sure no one will make them because they're pretty labor intensive, but we were supposed to bring the recipe, so I did.

Here's something I don't like.  Gnats.  Nope.  Don't care at all for them.  Now, in normal every day life they don't matter at all to me, but when they get in my house, I do not like them.  Not at all.

Tricia stopped by the other day.  I love when Tricia stops by.  If you read Tricia's blog, you'll read an anecdote about how I know her so well.  I'd just like to point out how nice it is to have a friend like that.  A friend that I can predict what's REALLY going to happen even when they're not even sure that's what was going to happen.  Love that.

Dusty got a clock from his grandmother's house when we were going through things, and it's a digital clock with the date that spins around and around.  Hannah read the date on the clock the day that Dusty plugged it in, and ever since then she has recited the date.  Today we were dropping off some Mary Kay at a clinic where I have some customers, and a nurse came by asking another nurse what day it was.  Hannah said, "May 16th" as she was walking.  Neither woman heard her, but I thought it was hilarious because here's this adult that actually understands the concept of dates within a month, and here's a four year old that barely can grasp what it means (although she has already remarked that tomorrow is May 17th), and she knows the date.  She's such a smartie.  Now Hannah wants to write a letter on my computer, so I will now hand it over to her. :)

Another week older and deeper in debt

OK, so maybe not the deeper in debt part, but I am another week older.

One of our best friends is moving to Nashville from Jackson.  It happens to be Dusty's cousin, but the cousin's wife and I are great friends, and I will miss her and their daughter a lot.  It's still a little bit up in the air, but they're 95% sure they'll go.

Dusty has been contacted by a company that wants to talk to him about a job too, but it has been 4 years since Dusty submitted his resume to them.  It seems pretty random that they'd contact him now.  They haven't been able to really get in touch with each other, in order to be able to relay important information, and I'm figuring it's not really going to work out, but it's just nice for him to be recognized.

I've been a reading fool recently.  I'm really tired, and don't want to do a whole lot.  I'm wondering if I need to get out and exercise, and get my energy level back up, or maybe I'm just drinking too much coffee and my body is revolting from the amounts of caffeine.

OH, man.  I just remembered I have to make some cupcakes, so I'll cut this short and go do that for tomorrow.

Mother's Day

We wound up getting ready really fast this morning, and we were able to make it to the 8:00 service (at 8:10).  Pretty good considering it takes us 25 minutes to get to church, and Seth didn't get out of bed until 7:20.  I didn't even get up until 7.  We took the kids to worship with us.  Hannah sang her heart out.  She was reading the words and singing them loudly.  It was probably close to the most precious thing I've ever seen.  I had brought coloring books for them to do while the sermon happened, and in the middle of the sermon Hannah had to go to the bathroom.  We were coming back in, and I stood at the back closing the door quietly.  I turned around to go and follow Hannah into the back row, where we were sitting, I saw she had walked down 3 or 4 rows to sit down.  The people around there knew where we were sitting, apparently, and were trying to direct her to the correct row.  I whispered for her, and she came back to our row.  There was a guy in a wheelchair at the end of our row.  Somewhere between leaving our row, and using the bathroom, she forgot where we were sitting.  Not embarrassing at all.  :)  We went to Sunday school, then did the nursery.  Oh my word.  We had children barely three.  I am so grateful for the behavior of my children.  Wow.

My husband took me to a restaurant with little waiting after church, so we got a great lunch out.  Again, my children acted perfectly!  I am such a thankful mommy!! They sat and ate, and weren't loud.  They didn't even seem inconvenienced by sitting there and eating.  It was a great lunch (and dessert :) ).

We ate leftovers for supper, and the kids went down on time tonight.  It was a great day.  I wish we could do it all over again tomorrow.  Of course, I'm a mommy, so I get to do this every day.

Good Day/Bad Day

I'll start with the bad day first.  I just realized that on Tuesday I accepted the responsibility of Dusty and me watching a room of 2 year olds in the nursery tomorrow, not realizing that tomorrow is Mother's Day.  I'm so ticked off that they didn't care to mention that to me on the phone, and that I was dumb enough not to realize it.  So now, happy mother's day to me, HERE watch some MORE kids that you don't even KNOW!  I'm so irritated.  I am so terribly not happy about this.  I don't get to hear the Mother's Day sermon.  I don't get to be peaceful for Mother's Day for 2-1/2 hours without kids.  I'm so angry.  It's totally clouding my whole day, which was good.

I'm going to start talking about my good part of the day, and hopefully that will make me less angry.  OK, typing that sentence didn't work.  I just had to pause for a minute to express my anger out loud, yet again.  We went to my in-laws today to have a mother's day day for my mother-in-law because tomorrow I really wanted to just stay at home after church and have it be MY mother's day.  The kids had a pretty good time, but their primary toys were out of commission, so that put a temporary damper on their play.  They did have fun playing inside though.  (Nope...not helping yet.)  Hannah didn't take a nap and was EXHAUSTED.  She fell no less than three times this afternoon, and was just having a rough time.  We were on our way home, and we passed by the Strawberry Festival, which has a carnival.  I mentioned going to Dusty, and he said he was fine with it, so we asked the kids, and they were VERY excited.  It wound up we only had $9 cash, so Dusty had to go across town to the bank and get a little more money, so they kids could actually ride two rides each.  They both rode the carousel,  Hannah rode a mini-roller coaster, and Seth rode a train type ride that just went around in a circle, but he liked it.  Hannah LOVED hers.  We got a bit of fair food, which was good and artery clogging.  The kids had a great time.  First experiences with a port-a-potty.  Seth went in with Dusty to use the urinal, and he was standing up to go.  Now, we usually have him sit down at home because it's just less messy, so he's not accustomed to going standing up, but this was not the first time he has ever done this.  It was, the first time in a port-a-potty though.  Different world altogether.  Dusty was waiting for him to go, and asked why he wasn't going.  Seth said, "Daddy, my potty went away."  They came out and Dusty informed me he hadn't gone.  I asked him why, and he said, "Mommy, my potty got stuck."  Huh.  I know what you mean.  Looks like we have a bladder shy little guy.  :)  Yeah, ok, so that part cheered me up a bit, but only because it removed the blaring focus from the inevitable irritation.


OK, I just looked at facebook.  My perspective has been changed, and my "poor me" outlook has dimmed.  I have a friend whose dad was diagnosed with ALS.  He is going downhill VERY fast.  She is going to lose her dad probably within a year.  Her grandmother just had a stroke.  Her husband will be having brain surgery in the next six months.  Her baby boy, they just found out, has autism.  She is continually saying that God is good in all situations, and I am not sure I would have the same mantra.  I know He is, and I would remember that, but I'm not sure how much I'd believe it.  I mean, if I get this much in an uproar over keeping the nursery on what is just another Sunday that has a name?  Wow.  Pretty petty.  I'll go tomorrow and serve with gladness.  There is some mother out there that needs to be in the service more than I do; someone like my friend.

My husband is asleep on the couch next to me.  Perhaps we'll turn in early tonight.  I have pictures on my phone from tonight, but those will wait for another day.  Thanks for letting me "talk" through my emotions.

Oh, Come ON!

We found out today that Dusty's grandfather has throat cancer.  We know no other details except he'll have diagnostic tests and will receive treatment in Memphis.  He'll be 75 in a couple of weeks.  I don't know if it's our age and people are getting older, but it just seems like it's one thing after another.  My aunt, my dad, Dusty's mom's skin cancer treatment, Dusty's grandmother, Dusty's aunt, Dusty's grandfather, and my grandma falling last year, and now having knee replacement.  While my family's side is serious, it's curable and things will wrap themselves up and be well.  Dusty's family has had two deaths, and one very serious bout of cancer.

In spite of all this, I feel so thankful for my family and Dusty's family.  I'm so grateful for the love of my little family.  We've had a great day today.  Dusty took today off to get stuff done.  He hasn't done a lot outside yet, but he got some things picked up in Jackson that he's needed to do, and the kids and I did some in Jackson separately from him.  The weather is gorgeous.  We're about to go outside and play because both kids have just awakened.  Dusty is tilling up some more ground for more garden space.  The kids and I can maybe go on a bike ride around our little circle.  They love that.  Seth has trouble multitasking.  He can't pedal, steer and look ahead of him all at the same time.  He can pedal, but I have to steer for him.  He can steer, but I have to push the bike and constantly remind him to look forward.  It's hilarious.  To me AND him.  Yesterday, every time I'd say, "Seth, steer.  Seth, look forward.  Seth, you're going in the middle of the road. Seth, you're going off the side of the road." he'd crack up.  It was amusing for all.

So if you think about it, please pray for Dusty's granddaddy, Jerry Castellaw.  He's in for a big change and a lot of tests.

Faithful blog readers

I haven't been posting.  I'm very aware of this.  I've been trying to cut back on the amount of time I spend on the computer because I feel like it's taking away from the real life aspect of my life.  I feel like I do this instead of taking time for me in the afternoon, spending time with the kids, or spending time with Dusty.  So if I don't post as often for a while, it's because I'm busy most times when I would have normally been able to post.

We've been doing school with Hannah, and she did 20 pages yesterday, and she wanted to call Grandma and Grandpa and tell them about it.  We called Grandpa, since Grandma was busy, and she told him she had done 20 pages in school.  Seth said he wanted to talk to Grandpa.  He said, "Grandpa I did eleventwelve pages!"  Grandpa was undeniably impressed with both of them.  A little confused at the exact amount of pages Seth had done, but impressed nonetheless.

We started reading the 5th book in the Little House series.  Hannah finished the 4th book, with a little coaxing at the end.  She had about 60 pages left, and she read it two naps in a row.  She had 16 pages left, and I asked her to go ahead and finish it, so we could take it back to the library that day.  She didn't really want to, but she did because she wanted to finish it.  When she finished it, she jumped up and down on the couch.  :) She was ecstatic.  We got the 5th book that day, and when we got home she said she didn't want to read that one; she wanted me to read it.  So I'm reading it.  I really like reading those books, and even more so when I'm reading to them, so it's a win-win. :)  In the reading of the 5th book yesterday, Jack died.  Jack was their dog.  She wrote it in a way that was a little obscure to younger readers as to what had just happened.  She said, "Pa had spoken to Jack, but he didn't stir.  All that was left of Jack was the stiff, cold body..."  That's not a direct quote, but it's a close enough quote, so I don't have to get out of bed and go upstairs to have a direct quote.  Hannah completely missed the subtext of those sentences, so when I said it was sad that Jack had died, she said, "Jack DIED?!? WHY?!?!?"  I explained that Jack was old (exactly what I had just read in the book), but she still had more questions.  She wanted to know if he would be in "our" heaven.  Dusty answered affirmatively, that God had created all creatures, and that he thinks there will be animals in heaven (but not certain ones, right, Dad?).  She said when she goes to heaven she wants to pet and play with Jack, too, just like Laura did.  Dusty said she might not want to call for him by name because there are probably a lot of dogs named Jack in heaven, and they'd all come running to her.  She said, "Oh, yes.  There are 109 Jack dogs in heaven."  109?  Where in the world did that come from?  (That last phrase, what or where in the world, has been said by my daughter, in an appropriate way, a few times recently.  It cracks me up.)

A member of our family had a birthday recently, and we called to sing.  Hannah asked how old she was, and I said 38.  She said, "Whoa.  Her head is almost to touch the ceiling."  I told her no, at some point people stop growing, but still have birthdays.  Seth said, "Is it going to touch the car ceiling?"  Nope.  Hannah asked, "When will she be 39?"  I said, "On this day, next year."  She said, "Soooo.....Tuesday?"  Ah, the inability of a child to understand time.  Love that.

We were supposed to have a Bible study tonight.  No one came.  Dusty didn't send out a reminder email, but we did announce it in Sunday school that we'd have it.  No one came.  It wouldn't have been as frustrating had someone not told me about an hour before everyone was to arrive that at least one of the people in the couple would be coming.  Forty minutes after it should have started, I texted.  No response.  Twenty minutes later, I texted again.  They were actually coming to pick up something of ours to borrow, but she responded telling me they weren't going to borrow it after all, so they weren't coming.  Um, thanks for letting us know.

I think I'll choose to focus on the cuteness of my kids instead of the unreliability of certain adults.  And now, I'll go to bed.  We've been going to bed WAY too late recently, and I'm completely drained.  Hopefully, I will post again soon.  Thanks for sticking around to read this, those of you who are still reading.