Here I sit wishing I could sleep. Poor Dusty has to stay up late to close accounts for his company, so here I sit with him because I have a hard time sleeping when he's not there and I'm anticipating him coming in. Last month he was up until 2:30-3 finishing it.
Too bad the lady at Lowe's was incorrect and tomorrow is NOT 09/31, or we wouldn't have to mess with this because it's a lot easier to close on the weekends because you have the whole weekend, and not just one night. You'd think there might be a more efficient use of a worker's time. Too bad he's not hourly...well, never mind. That would be awful. At least he gets some semblance of flex time. But getting back to the lady at Lowe's. You're what 55? 60? You don't know that September only has 30 days yet? I guess some people will never learn.
Please be in prayer for Don Cheney and his family, those of you that know him and haven't heard. He was recently diagnosed with ALS, and has been given 18 months of life left. Also, you who knew Dan Fitzgerald know that those will be some of the worst moments in his and his family's lives because of the tragedy and deterioration that is that disease. It crushes me for them, but especially Ashleigh. She's trying to hold it all together for her 3 boys. Man, lots of sadness the last couple of days. Flooding in Norfolk, my friend's baby, Don. Hopefully that's the 3, and there's not anymore. Not sure I could handle much more in the way of painful diagnoses. I'm praying there aren't anymore. Only positives. Or negatives, whichever would be positive...or negative. Never mind...
Hannah gets a new-to-her bed tomorrow. It was mine when I was living at my parents' house, and it was my mom's grandmother's bed before it was mine. I know Hannah doesn't understand the heritage, but I do, and my mom does, and that makes tomorrow a very special day. She also will have the dresser and nightstand that I had that match the bed. The question is, where exactly will all of this furniture fit? Perhaps there will be a dresser smack in the middle of the room. Would that fall under Feng Shui? ... Doubtful. I think we might have to relocate the roller coaster (yes, roller coaster) that's in our guest bedroom (it was a Christmas present from his grandparents. What were we supposed to do with it?) and place a piece of the furniture in there. That may work. Right, so I'm going to go to bed now, with the hopes of falling asleep and the closings to be fast, before I start telling you about my chipped toenail polish and my frizzy hair. Shoot. Too late.
Thursday, September 30, 2010
I'm not going to be posting very much for the next two days because we have guests. They will take up most of my time, although I will try and post on occasion, just so I don't forget things. Also, I made some chocolate caramel cupcakes last night, so I will post pictures of those soon too. Oh my word, they are the best cupcakes I have ever eaten. More on that later...
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Push Over
That's me. Biggest one EVER. I have piano students. I have a piano studio policy. It requires the student to be upfront with their payments, and to either pay monthly, or bimonthly. I teach 2 girls that live right next door. She should pay for 4 lessons, 2 weeks, BEFORE the lessons. Almost since the beginning of this semester, which began the last week of July, she has been late. Not just one week late, but TWO weeks. I am now sitting here, having given two lessons yesterday and two lessons last week, without getting paid. She paid me the previous payment 2 hours after their lessons were over. I'm just tired of giving 4 lessons before getting paid, and it's awkward for me to go over to her house and knock on the door to ask for the payment. I mean, it would be one thing if I didn't know them, but I do, and they're next door. It makes me want to stop teaching them altogether (like that wouldn't be awkward). I will have to go over there after next week's lessons, if she doesn't give me a check between now and then. I will insist after those lessons that she pay me for that week, and the previous two weeks. Does any of this make sense? I feel like I'm talking in circles, unable to make myself clear on the timing. Oh well.
Last night Hannah was reading a Bible story about baby Jesus being introduced to the people in the church, Simeon and Anna. I told Hannah the man's name was Simeon. Simeon, she repeated. Then, as she read the story she said, "The took him to the temple and handed baby Jesus to Cinnamon." HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! We tried so hard to hide our laughter because she does so well reading. Every once in a while...just have to let it out.
Today we went to story time at the library. Hannah is such a good girl. The lady was reading the story and two girls kept standing up in front of the book, which makes me want to stand up and say, "Excuse me, whose kids are these? Could you possibly make them sit and act like civilized members of society?" It's not like there are 50 kids in there. There were maybe 10. Poor Hannah kept trying to look around them and see the book. Never did she complain, and never did she try and stand up and get in other people's way. Then she did stand one time to point at something, and after she did so, I said, "Hannah, sit down." She did immediately. Then all of the other kids, and when I say all, I mean, every single kid except Seth, were crowding around this puppet raccoon stuffed animal in a trash can. Sweet Hannah just sat there trying to see around them. When I noticed, I said, "Hannah, you can get up to go see it!" She did, but kept back so the other kids could enjoy it. I'm not sure how to handle this because I wish she were a little rougher so she could get in there and enjoy things too, but I do not want to encourage her to be pushy or selfish. We've tried to instill selflessness in our children, I only wish other parents did the same. I would love to reward her in some way for being so kind, but I may have missed that opportunity, since I didn't take advantage of it immediately. However, she did get to play with that raccoon later. She got to put her hand in and let Seth see it, and then Seth did the same for her. They really enjoyed being able to do it themselves. Hopefully that was enough to treat her. I'll be sure to compliment her later though. She really is the most well behaved little girl I have ever encountered. Love her. :) OH, and who knew that Itsy Bitsy Spider was full contact!? Hannah, I guess, because when she washed the spider out, she smacked the kid next to her in the head. She was unphased. I laughed out loud.
Last night Hannah was reading a Bible story about baby Jesus being introduced to the people in the church, Simeon and Anna. I told Hannah the man's name was Simeon. Simeon, she repeated. Then, as she read the story she said, "The took him to the temple and handed baby Jesus to Cinnamon." HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! We tried so hard to hide our laughter because she does so well reading. Every once in a while...just have to let it out.
Today we went to story time at the library. Hannah is such a good girl. The lady was reading the story and two girls kept standing up in front of the book, which makes me want to stand up and say, "Excuse me, whose kids are these? Could you possibly make them sit and act like civilized members of society?" It's not like there are 50 kids in there. There were maybe 10. Poor Hannah kept trying to look around them and see the book. Never did she complain, and never did she try and stand up and get in other people's way. Then she did stand one time to point at something, and after she did so, I said, "Hannah, sit down." She did immediately. Then all of the other kids, and when I say all, I mean, every single kid except Seth, were crowding around this puppet raccoon stuffed animal in a trash can. Sweet Hannah just sat there trying to see around them. When I noticed, I said, "Hannah, you can get up to go see it!" She did, but kept back so the other kids could enjoy it. I'm not sure how to handle this because I wish she were a little rougher so she could get in there and enjoy things too, but I do not want to encourage her to be pushy or selfish. We've tried to instill selflessness in our children, I only wish other parents did the same. I would love to reward her in some way for being so kind, but I may have missed that opportunity, since I didn't take advantage of it immediately. However, she did get to play with that raccoon later. She got to put her hand in and let Seth see it, and then Seth did the same for her. They really enjoyed being able to do it themselves. Hopefully that was enough to treat her. I'll be sure to compliment her later though. She really is the most well behaved little girl I have ever encountered. Love her. :) OH, and who knew that Itsy Bitsy Spider was full contact!? Hannah, I guess, because when she washed the spider out, she smacked the kid next to her in the head. She was unphased. I laughed out loud.
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Oh, and another thing
Strange that last night I was thinking about the miscarriage, and my friend who's pregnant with twins. She had her babies today. One of my friends on facebook said it best, I think, "Heaven and Earth both gained an angel today."
Naptime
I went and put Seth's sheet back on his bed right before naps. Love-a-Lot bear was in his bed. I thought he had put him in there to sleep with, so I left him.
A couple of minutes after I came back downstairs Seth called, "MOMMY! There's a Care Bear in my bed!"
"Yes. If you don't want him in there, just throw him out of your bed."
"OK"
*Thud*
"MOMMY! I don't want him in my room."
I walked upstairs to retrieve the discarded bear. I picked him up and started to walk back out the door.
"Thank you, Mommy. You can put him in the guest bedroom, Mommy."
"OK, Seth."
End Scene.
A couple of minutes after I came back downstairs Seth called, "MOMMY! There's a Care Bear in my bed!"
"Yes. If you don't want him in there, just throw him out of your bed."
"OK"
*Thud*
"MOMMY! I don't want him in my room."
I walked upstairs to retrieve the discarded bear. I picked him up and started to walk back out the door.
"Thank you, Mommy. You can put him in the guest bedroom, Mommy."
"OK, Seth."
End Scene.
Monday, September 27, 2010
Not very happy-go-lucky
I was talking to a worker at the gymnastics gym where the kids play on Monday mornings, and she asked how old my kids are. I told her just under 21 months, and then I told her that I would be almost 38 weeks pregnant right now, had we not miscarried in March, and Seth and that baby would be just over 25 months apart. I'd have had 3 under 4. We talked awhile. I think Hannah overheard a lot of that conversation because tonight she asked me if I had a baby in my belly. I told her no, and she asked the question she used to ask frequently, "Did it die?" Well, that's what we told her when I miscarried because it's important to be upfront with that kind of situation with small children. They don't understand euphemisms, or weird phrases people use, like "lost the baby" or "passed away" or even miscarriage. The "lost the baby" one is what most people say, and to a literal child, a child that only understands concrete situations, they wonder if they also will be lost, so blunt was it. The baby died.
I was due October 14. Just 2 1/2 weeks away. I have a friend who is pregnant and due October 15. She's pregnant with twin girls. One of those girls has anencephaly. Very likely that baby will not live longer than a couple of hours, but they'll be lucky to even get minutes. They'll have one baby left and have very strong memories of the baby that died. They'll meet her, they named her, they've seen her in ultrasounds, they've felt her move. I had none of that. I'm thankful for that. I can't imagine the pain she's going through even now, with the wonder of how long she'll live, and how the emotional pain will feel watching that baby die. Yeah, I'm thankful I don't have to endure that.
Even without those tragic conditions, it made me cry to think about this baby that we lost. Moses. That's what Hannah said she wanted to name it when we told her we were pregnant. I asked, "But what if it's a girl." Moses. Moses it was. Tonight I put Seth in the bath, and watched Hannah get in the bath knowing how much she wanted to have that baby brother or sister. How excited she was when she looked through and read what she could of my pregnancy books, even though she'd only been reading a couple of months. Dusty offered to bathe the kids for me, just so I could have a break because I've had a bad day (I hate Mondays). He didn't know my emotions. We've been grateful for the miscarriage because I don't know how I could've handle the added stress. I don't handle stress. I don't handle it well, I don't handle it poorly; I just don't handle it. I spontaneously combust. I know I could've done it though, adding another one. Not saying I want another one.
I just wonder if it was a girl or a boy. I wonder whose characteristics this baby would've had. Hannah's obviously mine, and Seth is obviously Dusty's. Would this one have been a mixture? How in the world could the two of us be mixed? I think about how Hannah would act with that baby, and how much she'd love it and kiss it, and want to hold it, and bring me diapers, and anything I'd need. I think about that new baby feeling. The sleep deprivation that borders on not being worth it, but winds up being worth it every time. Nursing the baby and the roller coaster of emotions that come with that. All the firsts for the third time. Rounding out the grandchildren with Number 14, instead of the "unlucky" 13. Just some tough thoughts for a crappy Monday.
I was due October 14. Just 2 1/2 weeks away. I have a friend who is pregnant and due October 15. She's pregnant with twin girls. One of those girls has anencephaly. Very likely that baby will not live longer than a couple of hours, but they'll be lucky to even get minutes. They'll have one baby left and have very strong memories of the baby that died. They'll meet her, they named her, they've seen her in ultrasounds, they've felt her move. I had none of that. I'm thankful for that. I can't imagine the pain she's going through even now, with the wonder of how long she'll live, and how the emotional pain will feel watching that baby die. Yeah, I'm thankful I don't have to endure that.
Even without those tragic conditions, it made me cry to think about this baby that we lost. Moses. That's what Hannah said she wanted to name it when we told her we were pregnant. I asked, "But what if it's a girl." Moses. Moses it was. Tonight I put Seth in the bath, and watched Hannah get in the bath knowing how much she wanted to have that baby brother or sister. How excited she was when she looked through and read what she could of my pregnancy books, even though she'd only been reading a couple of months. Dusty offered to bathe the kids for me, just so I could have a break because I've had a bad day (I hate Mondays). He didn't know my emotions. We've been grateful for the miscarriage because I don't know how I could've handle the added stress. I don't handle stress. I don't handle it well, I don't handle it poorly; I just don't handle it. I spontaneously combust. I know I could've done it though, adding another one. Not saying I want another one.
I just wonder if it was a girl or a boy. I wonder whose characteristics this baby would've had. Hannah's obviously mine, and Seth is obviously Dusty's. Would this one have been a mixture? How in the world could the two of us be mixed? I think about how Hannah would act with that baby, and how much she'd love it and kiss it, and want to hold it, and bring me diapers, and anything I'd need. I think about that new baby feeling. The sleep deprivation that borders on not being worth it, but winds up being worth it every time. Nursing the baby and the roller coaster of emotions that come with that. All the firsts for the third time. Rounding out the grandchildren with Number 14, instead of the "unlucky" 13. Just some tough thoughts for a crappy Monday.
First Order and other snippets from the day
I've officially had my first order for baked goods. One of Dusty's coworkers wants to get 2 loaves of sourdough bread (this will be a continuous thing whenever I have bread freshly made near the weekend), and sometime he wants a cake, but he's an odd character, and he doesn't quite understand that I don't just randomly decide to bake a cake for someone. Yes, I do that with cupcakes on occasion to try out new recipes, but a chocolate cake with chocolate icing...done that. Not going to randomly do a cake of any kind, actually.
I dislike mortgage companies. How is it that they ordered a credit report for our refinance, but only sent us the scores, companies and the comments on our scores, not the accounts or balances. When I requested a copy of the full report from our broker, she said that they couldn't give the report to the customers anymore. What? WHY??? I know there's probably some "protection" reason for it, but for now I'm thinking it's just stupid.
All of this has made me not want to cook supper tonight. Surprise, surprise. We have leftovers we could eat, but nothing that I really want. I want to go to Chick-fil-A, but I know that we'll more than likely go there later this week because of visitors we'll have. Problem is we went out to eat for lunch yesterday, and we're trying to save money in case this refinance does go through because it's going to up our monthly payment.
I was complaining this morning to my mom about going to the gym with the kids, and everything else that was bothering me, when my knuckle hit one of the buttons on my steering wheel. It restarted the song the kids were hearing. When I realized what song it was I stopped talking. The song was the scripture, "Do everything without complaining or arguing, so you may become blameless and pure, children of God." OK, God. Gotcha. It has just been one of those days where I think He tries to see just how far I can be pushed until I start complaining again. Unfortunately, it's not very far today. Yet another reason why I want to go to eat tonight. Plus, I want to see the pictures of our family on the bulletin board there! That is all.
I dislike mortgage companies. How is it that they ordered a credit report for our refinance, but only sent us the scores, companies and the comments on our scores, not the accounts or balances. When I requested a copy of the full report from our broker, she said that they couldn't give the report to the customers anymore. What? WHY??? I know there's probably some "protection" reason for it, but for now I'm thinking it's just stupid.
All of this has made me not want to cook supper tonight. Surprise, surprise. We have leftovers we could eat, but nothing that I really want. I want to go to Chick-fil-A, but I know that we'll more than likely go there later this week because of visitors we'll have. Problem is we went out to eat for lunch yesterday, and we're trying to save money in case this refinance does go through because it's going to up our monthly payment.
I was complaining this morning to my mom about going to the gym with the kids, and everything else that was bothering me, when my knuckle hit one of the buttons on my steering wheel. It restarted the song the kids were hearing. When I realized what song it was I stopped talking. The song was the scripture, "Do everything without complaining or arguing, so you may become blameless and pure, children of God." OK, God. Gotcha. It has just been one of those days where I think He tries to see just how far I can be pushed until I start complaining again. Unfortunately, it's not very far today. Yet another reason why I want to go to eat tonight. Plus, I want to see the pictures of our family on the bulletin board there! That is all.
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